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Choose to Live Your Dream Life

You wake before the alarm, turn over and then it hits you – you are already behind on what you have to do today.   Out of bed you rush to get ready, grab something to eat, gulp down some coffee and zoom your nerves are already vibrating at hyper speed.   At the end of the long and exhausting day, you fall into bed bone-tired and weary, feeling that you didn’t accomplish many of the things you had to do, much less the ones you wanted to do. Sigh, is this the life I was born to live, you wonder.  No!

You have a choice; you can live the Life that You’ve Dreamed of Living.

Hah”, you say, “What is that? I would settle for having a life!”  Yes, I understand, I have been there. I know the edgy, nagging feeling, which gnaws at your insides and buzzes in your brain as you juggle more demands than humanly possible.

There is another way and I am delighted to share with you how.  Come with me on this journey to discover and fulfill your birthright – to live the life that you’ve always wanted.

I did not come from privilege.  

My early years were hard and I had a good number of devastating challenges in my later years too. However those are the very things that I give thanks for – my “training” gave me the understanding, insights and skills to achieve a life, which surpasses my wildest dreams.  

I am the second daughter in a traditional Chinese family and my birth was followed quickly by the birth of three younger brothers. To say that I was unwanted would be an understatement – my mother left me in the hospital and had to be called to pick me up. My inauspicious entry into the world foretold years of physical and mental mistreatment. Rising from an abusive childhood to leaving my home in Hong Kong as a teen for University in America alone, to becoming a global business leader and humanitarian, I’ve found the secrets to achieving a life better than I’ve ever dreamed was possible – and you can too.

Now I live in Santa Barbara, California, walking distance to the ocean and the mountains, sharing a sunny, spacious and cozy home with the love of my life.  I have retired from the corporate executive world to run my global speaking and consulting business and the non-profit charitable foundation I co-founded, from my home office.   As I look up from my home office, I see trees laden with ripening oranges, lemons and avocados in my organic garden, while the roses in the flowerbeds are vying with them for abundance and glory. On the other side, the pool is glistening in the sunlight, white and yellow plumeria flowers are wafting their sweet scent, the palm fronds and bamboo leaves are fluttering gently while the hummingbirds hover over the geraniums, lilies and irises in front of the little meditation house.

Reflecting upon how the role of women in America has changed, I realized that today we are expected to wear many different hats – daughter, wife, mother, friend, career woman, and community leader. Juggling all these things, we struggle to stay in shape, look beautiful, have a spiritual core and become self-actualized – other expectations that we, as well as society have placed upon us. Every now and then, we have to stop ourselves and ask, “Am I taking care of the most important person in the world?”   That would be you because without oneself, there is no way you could do anybody else any good.

Keeping all the traditional roles, women of our generation have taken on many additional responsibilities. Multi-tasking comes naturally to the feminine gender, leading us to believe that we can do everything, all the time, and all at once. But this is impossible, and sometimes in order to achieve what’s critical and to remain sane, we just have to say no.

Whenever you feel overwhelmed, stop, take a deep breath, and then take another one, and then say, “What would happen if I didn’t do this task at this very moment? What is really most important? What is the truth here for me?

Pull yourself back enough to get distance and perspective. Listen to the voice of your inner wisdom. The answer will come.

In order to stay true to my life purpose, I have learned to put my own needs high on the list of priorities and practice what I preach. Only by striving to make certain that my life is sustained in a balanced way can I make the positive difference that is my destiny.

After all, how can I help to heal the world if I can’t take care of me?

And you?  Are you neglecting yourself to take care of others?  Is that really working for you and your loved ones?  When you are giving is from lack – it’s unsustainable and will eventually not only drain you but also destroy the very relationships and structures you are working so hard to build.

Stop, take a deep breath, again, and repeat the above instructions as needed.  Remember that you are part of the whole – if you neglect/abuse yourself and become a hole – instead of a valuable part of the whole – the whole will also have a hole.

Yes I know the bills have to be paid, the work assignment and laundry done – somehow all will get done. Believe me, it will.



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